If you want the perfect body, I am not your trainer.
If you want your life to stop revolving around the next diet, to stop obsessing about falling off the wagon yet again with eating or exercise, to get stronger, healthier, and more fit, or to just find some calm, peace and love with your body, let’s talk.
I once read an article about an Olympian who trained for years to make it to the podium. He did and once he had that medal hung around his neck, his first thoughts were, “Is this it? Is this all I have been waiting for?”
I have found the same thing with people and their bodies. They lose the 10 pounds they have always wanted to lose, and now they want to lose more. They deadlifted the weight they have always wanted to and now they want more. They fit into their favorite dress and now it is not good enough.
From an Olympic medal to a women wanting to lose weight these emotions are indictors that is is not really achieving the goal for most, it is the feelings of accomplishment, pride, and effort along the way that really has the most impact on our joy and happiness.
When you get the perfect body you will always want more.
Don’t get me wrong, I know what it feels like on days when jeans fit too tight, when your stomach feels a little flabby or where you just feel gross and miserable in your own skin.
I know what it feels like to want to feel healthier, to look better, and to feel more confident but I also know the perfect body is not the solution to happiness or fulfillment.
Confidence and happiness are typically found more in the process of what you set out to accomplish, more than the end result itself.
The idea that having a smaller, more perfect body will contribute to happiness only sets us up for struggle and eventually being let down.
You might say I like to help women expand.
Not from a physical sense but from the mindset of realizing what you have to offer in life. Helping women get smaller and smaller with their bodies also makes me wonder if our mindsets and perspectives shrink as well.
Does the focus on the perfect body narrow our focus so greatly that it neglects other areas of our life?
We are most happy and fulfilled not when we reach our full potential but when we are working toward it.
I realize there are tons of programs that want to help you look better naked, get thinner thighs, get long and lean muscles, and flatten your stomach.
I realize that many fitness models sell their programs in their half naked bodies sending subliminal messages that you too can get their bodies with their programs.
And as humans we like that. We like something to aspire too. We like something greater than us to motivate to be the better version of ourselves.
We like the idea that if we can just control our diets and workouts that we will be good enough.
We really just want to be good enough, validated, and worthy.
And that is what I wish for my clients.
That confidence comes, not from the perfect body, but from doing the work, making improvements, and learning that yes they can do hard things.
Our bodies are more than a certain look and focusing on strength, health and overcoming our insecurities and fears is more rewarding than a flat stomach.
That while we can’t always control the outcomes we can control our efforts.
Our bodies will change inevitably. Skin will sag, wrinkles will form, age will set in and the less we can tie or value or worth with our bodies the better off we will be.
That we have more to offer the world than what our bodies look like.
Health is a series of sustainable habits developed overtime, not a magic bullet or quick fix.
That it is important to take care of our bodies but be more than a body.